My Homeschooler Won’t Listen To Me

Parents and teens often hit rough patches along their homeschool route. There is always the chance for disagreements or conflicts when making choices about education regardless of how or where your child attends school. But what do you do when your child won’t listen, complete work, or choose to improve their skill set?

Change Curriculum/Homeschool Style

Sometimes the homeschool style a parent prefers will not work for a child. Some parents are very traditional while others prefer a relaxed homeschool option. Many times, the conflicts families deal with have to do with a mismatch in homeschool or curriculum style with a student’s preferences or educational needs.

If you use online courses, try paper and book courses. If your child prefers to work outside of the house due to distractions from siblings, see if your local library has a study space. If workbooks are not working, try online options. If you are unsure of which options are best, consider looking for used or free curriculum, asking others in homeschool groups to text you a few photos of the types of lessons in a curriculum you are considering, or call the company to ask for a trial (if they offer this). You could also check your local library for curriculum options. Doing a little homework can often save you cash in the long run, especially if you try several types of curriculum before finding a good fit.


Have Someone Else Teach

It can be difficult to let go of the teaching portion of homeschooling. After all, the goal is to bond the family and learn together. Sometimes, though, it becomes necessary to hire a tutor, join a co-op, or utilize other local or online options. If your child refuses to complete tasks, is not making progress, and you find yourself arguing and punishing often, consider changing up who does the instruction for one of more subjects. Sometimes you or your child needs a break. Sometimes our kids prefer to learn from others. Often there are online or local options to help part or full time with this issue.


Ask Your Child For Input

One of the best pieces of advice is to include your child, especially teens, in the decision-making process whenever possible. Have them consider their future goals and job interests along with where they are now with skills such as math sense and reading level. This often helps motivate students t do well. If they can choose several courses, the type of materials used, and see their goals clearly, you may have less conflict over completion of school tasks.



Another great option is to either deschool, then go back to homeschooling or deschool and move into unschooling. Deschooling means you take time off from schoolwork to rest, recharge, and feel more at peace. Then, once you have deschooled for the length of time you feel works for your family or child, you move back to either homeschooling or unschooling. Unschooling is allowing child-led exploration and education instead of having adult-driven lessons. Unschooling may look like coding a website for fun, painting all day, exploring outdoors, playing at the park, reading a self-chosen book, etc. The key is that the child chooses and the adult supports if needed but does not push any particular topic or schoolwork.  The deschooling time period is a good time to make changes to curriculum or structure of your school day. You could use this option in conjunction with taking time to re-evaluate homeschooling options.



If you feel stressed out, need encouragement, or want to know what your options are, schedule a consultation with me. I am happy to put my experience to work for you.


Melissa Packwood, M.S. Ed. Photograph by Alexandra Islas

Melissa Packwood, M.S. Ed.
Photograph by Alexandra Islas


I earned my master’s degree in reading and literacy as well as an ESE graduate certificate. I hold a current teaching certificate and am working on my dissertation for my PHD in general psychology. As a consultant and reading coach, I focus on early childhood education, elementary education, moving from middle school to high school to college, reading and literacy, study skills, thematic units, and social skills. Additional services include public speaking, transcript preparation, and more. I look forward to putting my teaching experience and degrees to work for you.

Please contact me with questions or to request services.

You can also contact Melissa, The Reading Coach at 407-712-4368