Tag Archives: life skills

My Teen Doesn’t Want A Driver’s License

Sometimes clients ask if they should be concerned that their kids don’t want to get a driver’s license. In American culture many kids look forward to this rite of passage and are expected to want their license as soon as possible.

I think some parents also look forward to having less driving to do or help with younger kids. (I know I do.) It seems common for parents to be concerned if their kids are not yet interested in driving. After all, the other kids are driving, right? Why isn’t my kid?

Anxiety

Sometimes teens feel anxiety over new or different tasks. In this day and age where society pushes grades, tests, extracurriculars, and more, teens have a lot of demands on their plates. Adding driving to the mix can seem daunting to kids.

If your teen doesn’t feel ready, it may be wise not to push just yet. There may be other demands your child is struggling to deal with and though everything may seem fine, there may be big emotions at play. Worry over disappointing you, not being as advanced as friends, or concern over getting into an accident may be part of the issue.

 

Time and Commitment

Think about how many hours of drive time one needs to become a good driver. Being ready for any situation takes time and practice. Teens today have many goals and activities in their daily lives. Adding driving in can be difficult to do in between school, activities, and studying. Sometimes parents can work driving time into normal daily activities, but this may not be easy depending on schedules. Some teens see time needed to learn to drive as a roadblock. They may not want to start the process unless they know things will progress quickly.

 

Unconcerned

Sometimes teens just don’t care about driving. City buses, subway and above ground train options, friends, family, and other modes of transportation such as Uber have given teens and young adults more options for transportation. A few decades ago there were far less options but now there are many options, especially in cities and suburbs. Many teens see these options and decide that driving is not a necessity. They aren’t wrong. Depending on where you live, work, and go to school, you may not need a driver’s license. Plus, the costs of having a vehicle can be difficult to manage. Consider insurance, car payments, upkeep, and repairs.

While many adults prefer to drive, not all teens see this as a necessary part of life. If your child is not interested or wants to wait until later in life to learn to drive, try not to stress out. If there is anxiety in the mix, consider looking into ways to manage stress and anxiety. Overall, I encourage trusting your teen to let you know when they are ready to learn to drive.

Teaching Customer Service Skills

Many of my clients who leave public school to homeschool have told me there is less life skills education in their public schools as STEM and other ideals take over.

I have nothing against STEM, focusing on core academics, and other educational philosophies such as these. However, I see the issue with students graduating without life skills such as cooking, money management, and preparation for the workforce. 

It has become necessary for parents to make sure their children learn life skills so they will succeed in adulthood.

 

Teaching customer service skills is a great place to begin. Encourage role-playing games when children are young. Move on to yard sales and other odd jobs. Eventually, teens will be able to hold their own part-time job and practice consistently in a real-world setting.

Skill: Patience and Calm

Encourage children to handle disappointment and rudeness with calm and patience. Practice how to react when someone insults you in a work setting and how to handle this stress. Getting a supervisor or excusing oneself for a moment then coming back with a solution may help.

Skill: Compromise

Have your children practice finding compromises. Give them examples of situations they may encounter and ask how they think these issues ought to be handled, especially when a customer is irritated due to a long wait or poor service prior to meeting you.

Skill: Make It Right

Consider ways to solve customer unhappiness due to mistakes by the business or a delay in products or services. Practice scenarios which put your children in the position of a manager who is dealing with an employee’s mistake and must smooth things over with a customer.

Skill: Communication

After sitting in school and asking for permission to answer questions or go to the bathroom, students are often not prepared for communication and decision-making with a variety of customers with different ages, abilities, and needs. Practicing effective communication, including communicating with those who have special needs, is paramount to customer service success. Learn about varying needs, how to successfully communicate even if that means learning American Sign Language or finding an interpreter.

Skill: Time Management

Those who work in service and retail industries must be able to start and stop projects, change gears, then get back to the projects. Sometimes stocking has to happen, yet there is a line of customers to be checked out. It is important to prioritize, work quickly, and stay focused on each task while remembering the rest of the “To Do” list for the day. The ability to multi-task is highly important.

Skill: Strong Work Ethic

Working is not easy. Working in a field which includes customer service adds to the potential stress. Many times frustration makes people want to quit. It is important to teach our children to work through the stress, take breaks when needed, and help co-workers when they need a break. With support of co-workers and resilience, tough situations won’t keep our children from sticking with a job. Instead of quitting the first time things get tough, they will persevere and learn coping skills which will help them in all facets of life.

Whether we homeschool, unschool, or choose brick and mortar schools, customer service skills are necessary skills for our children to learn. We may have to work on these skills at home, then encourage our teens to get jobs. Early practice of these skills sets our children up for success in adulthood.